i spent the week saying goodbye.
mentally preparing myself for
something new.
and three days before departure.
another curve ball is thrown.
while you still act like you give up on me.

my impeccable timing has done it again.

my dad called me today
and told me that
i needed to make sure
i wasn't running away.
and agreed that
i carried too much
emotional baggage here
to find out,
just who it is i am
and which dreams
i'm out to follow.
he told me not to
run away.
to cross the t's
and dot the i's
leaving this place
as peacefully
as when i once
flourished here.

i just watched this for the first time in almost a year.



means so much more now.

manu: "one of the kids i tutor calls himself an happy emo. maybe u can be that too"

cantaloupe. mango. strawberry.
banana. kiwi. pear. nectarine.
orange. apple. blueberry.
pomegranate. peach. pineapple.

13 fruits for prosperity.

i hold my breath through all the tunnels
that wind around the city.

i look out for the first star
and say the stupid childhood rhyme.

i flip my wish cigarette, s-a-m-m-y.
and try to make some selfless request.

i look up my horoscope
and save my fortune cookies.



all to make sense of all the messy details.

i climb up 14th street
to the top of the hill
to say goodbye
to the city
and to one of my best friends.

then leave a scent of bacon as i part ways.