thanksgiving time begins.

shocks of euphoria leveled the walking ground.
rationalizations waited to turn to action.

nihilistic tones of green slept in afternoon haze
as i plucked white feathers that were falling to the ground
i stood a moment at a surreal landscape of empty soccer fields
passing ghosts of others' laughter coming from
the abandoned wooden sun-bleached seating

empty meadows were left for friday play
resting in the sun by sapling pines.

sudden realization for my need to be alone
and it's domino effect on those close to me
i remembered the day that we ran into the cliff.

i saw something special there again at the end of my today -
rays through trees that looked like angel wings perching over these modern ruins.


i carried all such memories of this place.
and sat alone to watch the sun set to a dancing haloed sky
i kick the bubbles of foam that waves leave at my feet
and see a new blue in the sky's reflection on wet sand.

i watch myself changing all of a sudden.
internal dialogues sharpen with external visions.


knowing that it would spread into my real life, i sang.
and all the while i thought of how i'd like to share this with you.

you can't always get what you want
but if you try sometime you just might find
you get what you need.

almost a year and a half ago i drove into the city with three friends. two were looking for a new place. the third came for the fun. running around the city, stress culminated in chinatown at lunch when i put my camera aside. after visiting the the apartment on castro this song appropriately played.

"deny me and be doomed."



hedwig and the angry inch.

i'm taking the risk of blacking out the friction
that grinds away at the surface of who we were.
i have been handed a new perspective
for light to shine through my life,
and if it only comes out on my accord
i will surely wear out sooner than the rest
but perhaps more happily than others before me.

all are welcomed through my doors
to feast at this table.
but if you intend to drag me through this pain any further,
i should ask you to wait outside my door
until i finish my meal

and then we can go on that long night walk
i promised before you left.

why the long face?

baptisms with filipino families
feels just like home.

clairvoyant storytellers
will leave you speechless.
it's okay to smile though
no one here is judging you anymore.

if my love offends you,
my deepest apologies.
no one here means
to offend with contradiction

you stopped telling me stories
and coated pain with sugar
singing melodies that i misunderstood
with a sometimes natural chatter.

the motorcyclist drove by with a cigarette,
hitting the curb in an attempt to keep up.
songs about green gloves don't phase me anymore
as i stand up, moving on with a flat tire.







from donnie.