i leave la today. for a bit.


with a ring for you in my pocket.
new proposals, different plans.
all pieces of advice and the reaction
keep pulling me back and forth to you.
scattered lines painted in mauve,
without a shadow
you moved alone among some scattered leaves.

i heard her voice singing quietly on the balcony
headphone's exterior faded sounds
of an old melody i used to sing
when i first came back a month ago.
hidden behind the inherited couches,
you slept there bathing in the sun.
you blushed and sighed, then smiled when you told me
how beautiful you thought my mind worked.

it felt better than any drunken kiss.
i danced inside myself.

and that night you came into my room.
i separated the two blankets so that you could have your own.
you curled under mine, instead
kissed me on the cheek and whispered thanks.
then rubbed my back like you used to when i was sad,
even though you were the one crying that night.

incapable of hugging you,
i was lost in the importance of wishing you,
good night.

and forgot, again to tell you
i love you, too.

e.